I’m watching the Cliburn competition, and have been for a few weeks now. It started with 30 pianists and has now been whittled down to 6. The musicianship has been amazing. I can’t imagine learning as much music as these young players learn … and aside from the new work all must be played by memory (and many of the musicians memorized the new work as well). I watch their fingers and I’m mesmerized. I’m in awe. I’m humbled. And I want to choose every one of them for first prize. Tomorrow night, after the final three performances, the top prizes will be handed out. Sometimes I can’t even watch, it makes me so nervous!
I really struggle with competitions. I don’t like comparing Joe to John, Jane to Jill. I just want to enjoy each one for who they are and what they do. I know the competitions help with the musicians’ careers, but I’m more of a “can’t they all be winners?” as my subject header reads.
I struggle with auditions, too. I always feel so happy for the person who wins, but I ache for all the rest. Of course we can only choose one. And so it goes.
When I was younger and living at home my family sometimes watched football together. We girls watched mainly for the marching band if it was college football (and that’s mostly what we watched back then). When it came to teams I remember we usually chose a favorite, but if that team started winning a bit too much my mother would change her team and cheer the losing team on.
I guess I learned to hate the whole winning/losing thing from her!